What’s the best advice you’d give to someone younger than you?
I was fourteen (14) years old when I had my first real boyfriend. He was five (5) years older than me. That was my first consensual sexual encounter.
I am now fifty-six (56) years old and I look back at my life. I see that I’ve had several sexual encounters and some of them I am not very proud of. Lots of them were pretty drunken. Does that count as consensual or non-consensual? Either way it makes no difference now.
I just want to keep this short. Having sex prior to marriage ruins the marriage, in my opinion. Because, you are wearing every other encounter prior to him. All of that bondage. It’s hard to erase and it’s hard to keep a marriage alive when your soul has already been shared. It makes your honeymoon a little less exciting. Kind of makes the marriage a little “eh”. You lose interest in sex at an earlier age than if you would’ve waited till marriage. Spouses often wonder if they’re better than any of the others before.
Now that I’m older and wiser I really wish I would have waited. Having sex at such a young age was really meaningless. It has made certain areas of my life feel meaningless as an adult. It had a profound effect on both of my marriages.
Oh, and by the way, yes, I was married twice. Do I think that is the right way to solve problems? No. I still believe what it says in the Bible about marriage. So yes, if I was to divorce, then I was to remain single. But I didn’t. I remarried. And stats show that half the people who have divorced and remarried will struggle. And I did. We did.
So, as a 56 year old woman, my advice?
Wait.
The Wiccan Christian 
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