What’s a chapter of your life you’d title “The Hard Years” — and what got you through it?
The hard years were the two years I developed a meth addiction. I don’t know who I thought I was, trying a drug for the first time at age 48! The most I had done in the past was alcohol and cannabis.
I didn’t even know the person I was dating at the time did it, until he brought it out in front of me. He asked me if I wanted to try it. I was already manic, so I said “sure”.
Well, I liked how it kept me manic.
In the end it turns out that I can no longer tolerate that stuff. It made me sick, I thought for sure I was poisoned. My insides felt dirty and slimy. Like my body was poisoned and I needed to detoxify. As if it wasn’t poisoning me before, right?
May 4, 2020 is my 6th Anniversary of being clean from that garbage. But it still affects my life in many ways. Mostly psychologically. Maybe some emotionally. Maybe a lot emotionally. All I know is I have two (2) PTSD diagnosis’s now: regular PtSD and Complex PTSD.
People may be wondering what the difference is? Here’s some differences:
- It’s my understanding that regular PTSD usually involves one incident.
- Complex PTSD involves abuse for an extended period of time. Like childhood abuse and neglect that was very normal for that family.
- Or at times I felt like a Prisoner of war, who is held captive for a period of time. Then released after being locked up for nothing.
We can sulk about the misfortune we have gone through, or we can take pride in the things we do have. Sorry, I didn’t mean for that to sound harsh. You just don’t know me well enough to learn I am very passionate about my beliefs and morals and values.
We can try and find retribution, or we can just plain let it go. Trust God knows what he’s doing and walk away. Now THAT is going to be the lesson I focus on today.
The Wiccan Christian 
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